Dirty Dave's Compilation of Canadian Jokes...

A young boy way taken away from his parents because he was being abused. When he was questioned in court, the judge asked him who he'd rather live with. The boy said "well I don't want to live with my Dad because he beats me. I won't live with my Mom because she beats me too... So I guess I'll have to live with the Toronto Maple Leafs because they don't beat anybody!".

There are three guys walking together, a Newfie, a Quebecer , and a Torontonian. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out, "I will give you each one wish, that's three wishes" says the genie.

So the Newfie says "I am a fisherman by', me dad's a fisherman, and his dad was a fisherman, and me by will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish". 'POOF' the oceans were full of fish.

The Quebecer was amazed, he said "I want a wall around da province of Quebec, so noting or no henglish people will get in". 'POOF' there was a wall around Quebec.

The guy from Toronto says "Tell me more about this wall."

The genie says "Well its about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out".

So the Torontian says "Fill it up with water".

Today a native was found nailed to a tree, stabbed six times and shot twice.

Regina police said it's the worst case of suicide they had ever seen...

Out west, the prairies, Toronto, Quebec or the maritimes. If you've got a good Canadian gag, send it to me eh!